Oh, okay, I’ll stop being such a bitch about internet dating. Eh, who am I kidding? No I won’t. Anyway, I wanted to give everyone the oh-so-impressive update on my ‘what’s in the works’ post from a scant 3 days ago. Remember that one? The list of all the guys that I was e-mailing with that I was maybe/maybe not excited to meet? Yeah, that has magically dwindled down to ZERO! Why, you may be asking? Well, my dear friends (the 3 of you that read this, that is), that would be because guys who internet date apparently are missing some sort of important something from the gene pool. That seemingly elusive gene that allows people to be up front; to say what they mean; to follow through; to not turn into flakey douchebags on a whim.
Here’s the demise of all my potential suitors with a few additional thrown in for shits and giggles:
*The guy I was supposed to meet for drinks on Thursday: cancelled due to sinuses (he says). Cancelled due to being a huge pussy and freaking out (i say). No future plans to reschedule.
*The guy that I gave my number to that I was actually excited to meet: yeah, no call, no further e mails, no response to my somewhat snarky ‘what the hell?’ message (go figure)
*Undercover cop guy who I thought was a perv, but turned out that I misunderstood his meaning (or so I thought). I responded to his apparently leading question about ‘hookups’ with an honest ‘no thank you’ to which he responded that he was glad that I was honest and he agrees with me and is not looking for just a hook-up. Then he immediately closed our communication. (you can do that on E-harm and send them away forever) 😉
*Flakey guy from E-Harm that asked me to meet twice and then flaked on me both times. Yeah, he closed our match too. (duh, I had no idea you could do that and am very sorry I didn’t beat him to the punch)
*Texas guy has seemingly fallen into some sort of abyss. Or been carried off by dingos.
*James, who I actually did meet, but didn’t have any chemistry with (and he wore jeans and a t-shirt and tennis shoes ……… and he weighed far less than I do) 😉
*There is one guy from one of my multitude of sites (thank god that my craptastic E-Harmony torturous membership expires at the end of the month) wants to take me to ‘bike week’ today. Outdoor biker fest. Nope, i’m not a biker. I do like to ride on the back of them and drink in public in the middle of the day however. Haven’t decided if I’ll go or not. Has the potential to be an excruciatingly long 1st date. But I’m pretty sure the people watching would be awesome!
*There was also a gorgeous nordic god lookin’ guy that I found on Match. 6’4″, blonde, amazing smile, stellar profile, seemingly very honest and up front, good heart, good body (stop acting like you’re surprised that I am superficial) ~ pretty much the perfect friggin’ package. I think I heart him. Anyway, he’s only 36 and only wants to date up to 34 (nice). As I’m a full 9 years past his limit, I knew it was not meant to be, but decided I would just e mail him anyway to let him know how much I loved his profile. He politely responded with a thank you and a good luck of his own. I guess it’s easy for guys to be polite when they know you’re not hitting on them?
And that, my friends, is the entirety of my ‘action’ from my multiple websites this week. In a nutshell ~ I got nuttin’ honey. 😉