43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Being Open Minded April 10, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 8:40 am
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I see that request a lot in profiles.   Requests that the woman ‘be open minded’.  I see that almost as much as I see that every single guy claims to love hiking.  I wonder, however, each time I see this request/requirement what the hell it means.  We all know that my mind immediately leans towards the pervy, so assume that they’re into threesomes.  Or midgets.  Or animalia (is that what it’s called?).   Or necrophilia.   Or, well, the possibilities are horrifyingly endless.

Now, while I of course think it has a dirty connotation, could they really just be requesting that we be open minded about religion?  Race?  Political leanings?  Yeah, I don’t think so.

‘Open minded’ is one of those smoke and mirror phrases that sort of leave you to wonder.  I wish they’d just be upfront and straightforward with what they want:

1) If I hit on your best friend, I’d like you to be open minded to the possibility that I will invite her home with us for a ‘sandwich’ *ahem*

2) If I hit on your best friend, I’d like you to be open minded to the possibility that I will invite her home instead of you

3) If I hit on some random girl out and about, I’d like you to be open minded to the possibility that I will invite her home with us for a ‘sandwich’ *ahem*

4) If I hit on some random girl out and about, I’d like you to be open minded to the possibility that I will invite her home instead of you

5) If I want to give the *ahem* backdoor a try, you’ll be uber excited and up for the pain experience

6) If I invite the neighbors over for naked hot tubbing, you’ll be okay with that

7) If I have a severe foot fetish and lick random strangers’ feet in public, you won’t judge me

8.) If I show you my ‘special room’ downstairs with the swing and the chains and the whips, you’ll totally be ‘open minded’ about trying it

Just spit it out guys.  What the hell do you mean by ‘open minded’?  I put in my profile (as everyone else does) that I want someone funny.  No, not funny looking, but funny.  That’s pretty self explanatory.  Funny is funny.  Open minded is, well, open ended ………..

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4 Responses to “Being Open Minded”

  1. stevesw Says:

    “Open minded”? Good question. I tend to be open minded, but sometimes you have to say nope, not me. When I started my dating Blog, I posted the worst ‘answering the door’ moment in my dating history:

    A friend was pursuing a girl from South America and he wanted me to take out her hometown friend. Ok, what are friends for, and how bad can her friend be.

    I ring the doorbell at the girl’s apartment and she answers the door looking as if she had not slept in a week.

    “You OK?”

    ”Tired…our football…you say soccer?…team is in town and I did the team.”

    “Guess you should get some rest…I’ll give you a call.”

    When my friend heard I “stood-up” the girl, his take on the event, and I re-explained what had transpired at her front door. He said, with all sincerity, “Steve, it’s a cultural thing she is proud of.” Surrrrrrrrrrrrre.

    • everevie Says:

      Damn Steve…you didn’t even bother to ask if she had enough energy for one more guy…you?

      (Just kidding…)

      Grey…I TOTALLY think the same thing when I see “open-minded”. Or…what about when they put in their profile that they want a girl that is “comfortable with herself” or “in touch with her sexuality”? At least that’s more straightforward…but, eww.

      • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

        okay, being the big perv I am Evie – whenever i see ‘in touch with her sexuality’ i totally take that in a literal way ……. nice …….

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      she probably just needed a little nap and then she’s be all set to do you too 😉


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