But it wasn’t my fault. And my heart wasn’t in it anyway. And it meant nothing. None of them did. Not one of the 5 ‘mandatory’ messages I had to send out on Match in order to not violate my 6 month agreement thingie. What the hell is a 6 month agreement thingie, you ask? It’s a horribly insulting promotion that Match runs in order to lure new members to their site and then make you feel like a ginormous loser if you can’t find someone in 6 months by ‘rewarding’ you with your next 6 months free. Yeah, I was the lucky recipient of the 6 month loser award last year and I look to be on track for the same stellar luck this year. 😉 The requirements are to keep your profile active and visible – no biggie. And to send out 5 e-mails to members you haven’t contacted in the past every single month. Shouldn’t be a daunting task, right?
Well, if you’re apathetic about the whole thing and haven’t really even logged onto match lately, I guess it is. I have been receiving a lot of messages that I really have no interest in responding to, but as this is my ‘bulk trash week’ for internet dating, I logged on today to clear out my ‘inbox’ (hee hee, that’s just sounds dirty). Sadly, I saw that I had exactly 2 days left to send out my 5 monthly messages. Super. So of course I did what any normal gal who is down on internet dating does when faced with such a challenge. I responded to one of the message I got. I sent out 3 other random messages. And I sent a message to that dipshit from last year that dumped me 3 hours before our 2nd date as he’d met someone better. Loser.
So the guy I responded to wasn’t all that stellar, but seemed nice enough. He did mention in his profile though that he had a ‘unique’ living situation. Red flag anyone? He lives with his parents? In a commune? With his 4 wives? Of course, even though I have no real interest in the guy I had to ask. Erm, he’s living in a trailer park right now. In his truck. With a camper thingie attached. As he’s ‘really picky’ about where he lives and is not comfortable with apartment living due to the lack of security. Huh. I never realized living out of your camper was considered high security. I think I would have rather heard that he was living with his parents.
The 3 random guys I don’t expect to hear back from as I just sent some lame ‘nice profile, made me laugh’ bullshit. No need to let them know that they were just ‘filler’. Or that I didn’t bother to even read their profiles. Or that they were just the 1st 3 profiles that came up 😉 shhhhh ………..
To douchey from last year I sent ‘Hi Dickhead, Funny, match sent your profile to me as a potential match. I’m sorry to see you back on here as apparently that means that the great girl that you met last year wasn’t so great. I’m sure you’ll have better luck this time around’ ………… snarky enough?