43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Eanie Meanie…… June 8, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 1:48 pm
Tags: , ,

Well, we all know that since I (may) have found a good guy (if he stops aggravating me, that is), that men seem to be popping out of the woodwork this week.  Yes, I have a date with someone tonight that seems nice.  And he’s 6’3″ (thank god), so I can finally wear heels!  I also have a very cute blonde haired, blue eyed 36 year old personal trainer that has been e-mailing me.  Now personal training is not my idea of a ‘career’ and I tend to think of stupid muscle-heads, but this guy is adorable.  Totally refers to himself as a geek and a dork and all sorts of uber self-deprecating things.  As I am the 1st one to admit that I am a HUGE dork myself, of course I find this to be a very endearing trait in others.  Of course it certainly doesn’t hurt that he’s H-O-T.

Sadly, in addition to these 2 possibilities, I have a couple other impossibilities that I would looooove to share with you.  Lucky you!

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The 1st is a physician.  A 5’10” 150 pound physician.  Uhhhhhhh.  A 5’10” 150 lb physician who seems to be a bit clueless when it comes to answering simple profile questions properly or being able to decifer religion from origin.  Here’s what Dr. Dumbass had to say on his profile:

Ethnicity : am a mix of Irish/jewish/and some south american…a true east coast mutt

 Favorite hot spot: I am new to the southwest, so I have not found any one place in particular. I love the golf course I found for its accepting ambiance and the beautiful view from this one bookstore

Okay, so I guess a lot of window-lickers (that’s for you MC and Jaye 😉 ), confuse religion with heritage.  Whatever.  I am a bit more concerned with his answer to the simple ‘hot spot’ question.  Does he really consider a golf course to be a hot spot (unless of course he’s going strictly by temperature on a mid July day), but I am a bit perplexed as to how or why someone would think a golf course has an ‘accepting nature’.  And where is this bookstore that he speaks of?  I do believe Dr. Dumbass may be one of those medical marijuana docs, but that’s just me.  What though, is it that he feels needs to be ‘accepted’ about him.  I think I’m not willing to find out!

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 I would like to next introduce you to Tom.  Tom seems like a nice enough fellow although his main profile pic somewhat resembles a mug shot.  He’s tall with salt and pepper hair and from what I can tell from his deer caught in the headlights main pic, might have nice eyes (if they actually ever closed and weren’t so friggin’ wide open!).  He sent me one message regarding my profile, saying it was ‘eclectic’.  Er …….. He also told me he was off to play hockey with kids and wanted to know how my weekend was.  Uh, okay, have fun playing hockey.  As I was/am none too bowled over by him, I promptly responded 2 days later with an innocuous ‘my weekend was great thanks, how was yours?’.  To which I get this :

 The weekend was fun. I have a cre I want to sell. Will be moving to a new house next month. The kids can skate but need help on team play. Much faster to pass the puck than skate.

My preference would be to talk on the phone. If you are not comfortable yet that is fine.

Now call me stupid, but I don’t know what the hell a cre is or why he wants to sell it (or why he thinks I care).  Or why he’d tell me he’s moving.  Or give me a critique of the actual hockey playing lack of finesse of the kids (and what kids are we talking about anyway?).  He sent me his phone number, but not sure that I want to use it.  He seems a bit ADD and random in his topics of conversation.  And he lives all the way across town.  And well, he’s just ‘okay’.  I’m not big on ‘just okay’ these days.

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I would be more than happy to pass on either of these eligible bachelors’ contact information should you request it 🙂

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6 Responses to “Eanie Meanie……”

  1. jgavinallan Says:

    Ellen:
    It is not necessary to give me any information on these guys. Actually, you make someone I know look real good. I think I should be more patient…considering what’s out there.
    Thank you
    Jaye

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      haha Jaye, the whole post wasn’t for you, just the ‘window licker’ reference 😉 Glad you’ve found someone you like! Yey!

  2. mysterycoach Says:

    Ya know… I really should NOT laugh at that…

    HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! HAHA! SNORT! (cough) s’cuse me LOL 🙂

  3. mysterycoach Says:

    oooh ADD My favorite… 🙂 No I don’t want his number but if you saw how distracted I am, can be and how I have to remember what I was saying sometimes? hmmm… and SHINY things! WOW … course a girl at the courthouse is a Gemini and she has some of the same traits.

    So, basically… I’m just hyper and attracted to shiny things… not so bad. 🙂

  4. I’m not going to ask what a window-licker is. The last time I enquired about an unfamiliar term my eyes bled when I found out… 🙂

    I can only assume that your Profile has some major spelling or grammatical error that you haven’t noticed for some reason. I know you are quite capable of clear thinking and spelling/grammar and don’t mean to insult you. But perhaps these plonkers see a glaring error (or even an imaginary one — now there’s a thought) and think, ooh, a like-minded moron, let’s contact her, we must be compatible. Seriously, how else could someone try to impress you with terms like “accepting ambiance” when talking about a golf course. It’s not poetic or metaphysical, it’s just stupid!!

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      apparently there is something in my profile that leads ridiculous men to believe that if only they are charmingly all over the fucking place and can’t string 2 coherent thoughts together, that they might have a chance! 🙂


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