43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

What They Write VS Who I Am June 12, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 12:24 am
Tags: , ,

So I got a lovely e-mail from some idiot bachelor on match that attempts to point out all the similarities in our personalities and backgrounds.  I sorta think he has me confused with someone else though.  You be the judge:


Hi, I’m Tom. I moved to Phoenix about 15 months ago. I live in North Phoenix and work in Tempe. I read your profile and see that we have some common interests.
I have two children that live in N. Carolina. (uh, I have no children and have never been to North Carolina – although I’d like to visit sometime) I have been divorced for about 4 years (i have never been married). I enjoy outdoor activities like hiking, mt biking, wake boarding, snow boarding or just about anything that keeps me active (i clearly state that I am the world’s biggest clutz). I enjoy motorcycle rides, or hanging on the lake (although last Sunday was a bit rough out there), i exercise about 4 times a week and like to keep fit. I have a positive attitude and i am energetic, I enjoy saying good morning to strangers or starting a conversation while waiting in line at the grocery store (yeah, I’m friendly and all, but don’t often befriend people at the grocery store that are just trying to pay for their frozen dinners and toilet bowl cleaner).
I also like to travel but most of my trips are unplanned weekend trips. I may come home on a Friday night and just pack a bag and take off.(not too far…Mexico, Vegas, San Diego, Flagstaff etc..)
I am looking for an energetic person with a positive attitude who wants to share adventures and enjoy life (HA!).
If you want to know more about me, write back, say Hi!

Hope to talk to you soon

Now although nice enough, it’s a total ‘form’ message that he sends to absolutely everyone.  If someone truly reads my profile they will absolutely hit on the ‘key’ points of me : sarcastic, uncoordinated, odd obsession with The Brady Bunch among other things.  I don’t think I mention wakeboarding, the lake, being outdoorsy (please refer to my post on not ‘getting’ the allure of squatting behind a bush), or having kids.  Not sure if guys realize how obvious they’re being when they do shit like this.


18 Responses to “What They Write VS Who I Am”

  1. How about you just write: What exactly is it you think we have in common?

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      Or better yet, how about I don’t write back at all? 😉

      • I’d actually like you to call his bluff. Seriously – what in the world was he thinking?! I’m sure he won’t answer, but it would still be a good way to point your finger a bit at him 🙂

        • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

          consider yourself lucky to not have to internet date – it seems as if very few guys actually bother to read profiles and only look at the pics ….. big dummies 🙂

  2. jgavinallan Says:


    Do guys on inter date ever tell truth or ever pay attention to your(any women’s) details?


  3. Surrey gal Says:

    I think it works this way: women usually wink, not write. Guys have the pressure of making the first email. It would take a lot of time and effort to write personal emails. So to maximise their outcome, they send a mass generated one to everybody they like, hoping that somebody will respond.

    I always delete them. Even if the guy is handsome. Because I think I deserve more effort than copy and paste. And I am more willing to reply to a less good looking one who actually writes something about my profile. Always makes me feel nice and appreciated.

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      I’m not a winker SG, I write e-mails. They may be lame and somewhat short, but they are certainly not ‘canned’. I figure if guys have to write e-mails, so should we. 😉

      • Surrey gal Says:

        But most women don’t (that’s what I was told by a guy) so that was a guy’s point of view. Or at least that’s what I think.

        It’s 11:00 am at your end, is it Sunday? Or Monday? I’m trying to figure whether you are behind or in front of me…
        Here it’s 19:00 Sunday.

        • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

          That’s probably true.

          It’s 11am Sunday morning here in sunny AZ. 🙂

          Oh wait! Didn’t you have your date tonight with Mr (not so) Rude?

  4. Matthew Says:

    You should write a response back. Then remove some key nouns, verbs and adjectives and tell him to feel free to fill in the blanks words he feels would best complete the sentence.

    Welcome to Match.com Madlibs!

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      LOL Matthew! I loved Madlibs when I was a kid! Who knew they would carry through to internet dating…..

  5. Tipsy Lucy Says:

    He’s clueless! You don’t have a single thing in common!

  6. Surrey gal Says:

    I did… and I liked him, unfortunately… damn :/
    And I always thought you are one day ahead of me, because when you post Leo Cleo it’s always one day too late. It turns out that rainy Surrey is 9 hours ahead of you!
    Looks like I can’t post a comment.

  7. josie Says:

    Yep, sounds scarily familiar to me. Here you can’t write to someone until you pay, so you send them a free kiss. I think the men’s approach is to send everyone a kiss, coz I have on my profile: Don’t like beer swilling me, who watch AFL footy, enjoying camping, and 4WDing, and water skiing. So THAT’s who send me a kiss. Clearly they look at the photo and then “kiss”. I also have an age range on my preferences, that is frequently ignored and men 10 years outside of that age range contact me.
    It’s like beating my head against a wall. I’d blog about it but it wouldn’t be as funny as yours!
    Josie x

    • Grey Goose, Dirty Says:

      Hi Josie! Yeah, internet dating guys are a special, special breed. The ones 15 years out of my age range are my favorite too! Amazing that no one bothers to read (or even look past a photo).

      At least we can laugh about it, right? 😉

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