Let’s see, one you can buy in the supermarket. One you get for those of the opposite sex (or same sex, depending on which team you play for). One you have total control over when to open it. One you have no control over when it will come about. One will go flat in no more than a week. One may last a bit longer than that. One I can only take in small doses as the sugar gives me a headache. The other I can only take in small doses because it turns me into a neurotic mess. One you can pour down the sink and recycle when you’re done. The other should never be recycled. Ever. One mixes great with vodka. The other, well, that could go either way when mixed with vodka.
As you know, my annoying date with Fanny Pack was cancelled yesterday morning as he has apparently fallen in the love in the 5 day gap between our 1st correspondence and me ‘making’ him wait to meet me. Uh, if only I lived a life of leisure where being available to meet all internet
idiots dates at the drop of a hat took precedence over actually working. Must be nice. Who knew it was a race? Anywhoo, when that fell thru in the morning, I thought I would try my hand at a little juggling. As in moving my (maybe) Wednesday plans with Red Onesie to last night. I sent him a quick text letting him know that my plans had fallen through and I was checking to see if he was available. To which I got the oh so touching response of ‘have plans already – darn’. Uhm, whatever.
So what’s a gal to do on a Saturday when the temperature is just below pizza oven digits outside and everyone else already has plans? Well that would include washing all the covers for my couch cushions (i know, please try to contain your excitement on my behalf) and going to the store to find mixers for the big ole bottle o’ vodka that I have sitting on my kitchen counter (usually i keep my vodka in the fridge or freezer, but this awesome bottle is about 3 feet tall so it won’t fit – gotta love costco). 🙂 Just as an aside, I don’t think I’ve drunk more in the past 5 years than I have this year alone. And it’s only September. Oh well, I guess internet dating can turn the best of us into lushes. 🙂 So as I’m perusing the ‘mixer’ aisle, I am faced with the dilema of not actually liking soda, or seltzer, or juice or anything else traditionally ‘mixable’. In the past I had found the absolutely perfect ratio of Grape Powerade Zero to Berry Powerade Zero to Vodka. Made me feel kinda healthy and sporty when I’d suck those puppies down. As I decided I would be ‘bad’ today (and because just about everyone in the universe is annoying me), I opted to go for the fizzy stuff. I am currently drinking something a very unnatural shade of purple that fizzes up mixed with my vodka. And it’s giving me a headache ’cause it’s so sugary.
So, I ask you, which is better to have? Grape Crush or a Human Crush? I’m not actually sure at this point …….