43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Uh Santa, This Isn’t Exactly What I Had In Mind December 19, 2011

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 12:12 am
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So every year it’s the same thing.  I put together my list for Santa.  I weed through everything, prioritizing what I want most and then just ’cause I’m a giver like that, I whittle it down to one thing.  The same thing.  Every single year.  And every year Santa lets me down.  Now I don’t know if Santa has been drinking more this year than usual (I know I certainly have, but that’s neither here nor there), but I’m not appreciating his sense of humor.  Okay, so each and every year I ask for a man.  The size, shape, style and ‘package’ may differ from year to year, but the basic concept is the same.  A man who pretty much worships the ground that I walk on.  Not too much to ask, is it?

Apparently Santa thought he’d throw me a bone this year by delivering a man on my doorstep.  Along with his dog.  To camp out in my guest room for an indefinite amount of time.  Super.  Yeah sure, I guess I had  something to do with the brain fart that resulted in me blurting ‘sure you can stay with me’ when asked if I could put him up for a couple of days.  Yeah, uh, days have turned into weeks and the dog is a big ole’ surprise.  He’s on his way over now.  Not sure how I get myself into these things.  Not sure how I can get myself out of this.  Pretty sure I won’t.  I don’t want to hurt his feelings.  So it looks like I’m having a house guest for a while.  G-d help me.

Oh, you want to know who it is?  Guess you’ll have to read back to refresh your memory of ………………. Finger Foods!  Holy hell.

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