43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Are You Filming A Pilot For An Awkward Reality Show? December 29, 2011

Is the exact response I got from my ex (aka: the free dog sitter) when I invited him over to dinner tonight.  Along with Finger Foods.  And my single male neighbor.  And TD.  🙂 I had already invited TD to dinner (well, more like he invited himself) and I knew that Finger Foods (aka: pain in my fucking ass when is he leaving) would be home so that would be just rude to eat in front of him.  Then I figured that my neighbor does so many nice things for me that I should invite him as well.  I figured he could engage FF in conversation and distract him from bugging the shit out of me as a bonus.  Then I figured hell, that isn’t quite awkward enough, I’ll invite my ex bf over as well.  The poor man can’t cook for shit and is practically wasting away.  Plus, I gotta keep him happy.  Do you have any idea how much dog sitters cost?!?  He is even better at sticking his foot in his mouth than TD is, so this is gonna be fun!  Or scary.  Definitely filmable, but I can’t figure out how to conceal a camera, dammit.

When I told the ex about the lineup and that TD isn’t real great around new people, he laughed and said he wouldn’t miss it for the world.  Then he asked if I was inviting the key wielding psycho neighbor ex-girlfriend as well.  Smartass.  Not sure why I decided to throw this little dinner party together tonight.  Me and 4 guys.  I know it will make TD uncomfortable and I really do need to let him know before he actually gets here.  😉 I hope this teaches him a lesson as to not fuck with my NYE plans (subsequent post to follow).

So all, when you’re home tonight relaxing and enjoying the company of yourself, your friends, your pets, your families, think about me and how fucking classic tonight is going to be!  I really am a bitch sometimes.  It would only be better if I were actually serving eggplant……….

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6 Responses to “Are You Filming A Pilot For An Awkward Reality Show?”

  1. Matthew Says:

    Eggplant means you’ll have plenty of gravy to share with us all tomorrow (or the days to follow once all the police reports have been filed).

    😉

  2. stevesw Says:

    I would have been nice if you had posted a list of players on the left side of the screen so we can better follow who is who as the action commences.

  3. emdashwood Says:

    Oooh – I didn’t even realize this was an approved method of retaliation when someone fucks with your NYE plans… I may have to arrange a dinner party of my own, as my pseudo-date for NYE appears to be backing out at the last minute…


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