So of course I couldn’t just let it go when Mr. Dickhead sent me a one word response to my e-mail. I could have been the bigger person and just let it go knowing what a douchebag he was and most likely always will be, but that just wouldn’t be my style, now would it? Instead I opted to take the uber mature road and send a concise response of my own that went something like this:
Thanks so much for your very wordy response. As you still didn’t bother to tell me your name or even go to the effort of phrasing your stellar one word ‘when’ in a complete sentence in response to my agreeing to meet for a drink, I feel that you deserve an equally stellar reply, so how about ‘never’.
Yup, I’m going to be single for a looooooong time to come.
So as for those words that I hope no one ever has to hear. Please refrain from yelling at your computer when you hear the very abbreviated back story and sending multiple ‘I told you so’, ‘You’re an idiot’, ‘You deserve it’, ‘Pull your head out of your ass’ comments. I know. I also know it will come as no surprise that TD came back into the picture after our
craptastic spectacular New Years Eve. We spent pretty much every day of January together. When my brother in law was killed TD was there for me every step of the way and honestly, I don’t know how I would have made it through things without him. Sure, I knew he had told me that he will be dating again, but I chose to pay attention to his actions instead of his words. Huh, who knew that neither are mutually exclusive. This time around though, he fooled not even himself and me, but everyone that saw us together. I gave up trying to explain that we’re ‘just friends’ to everyone around us as they all would shake their head and explain why I was the one that was mistaken. TD had even said that having had to go to yet another funeral with me has put a new perspective on things and how he really knew what was important now. Silly me assumed that meant regarding me. Actually it did. In that I’m not who he wants. At least not yet until he comparison shops around. As that makes absolutely no sense to me, I asked him yesterday, point blank, why it was that he was so quick to discount me as an option without even ever giving us a real chance at dating? How he was going to know when he had dated enough to know what it was that he was looking for? How, if you’re always looking for something better, you’re never going to be happy. Through tears, and explaining that he would in fact be comparing all of his internet dates to me, how it wouldn’t be fair for him to ask me not to date while he did, how it did bother him that I was dating others, then he uttered the most horrible phrase I’ve ever heard. And hope to never hear again. And yes, I should have known all along, but he runs so hot and cold and there is much more that I haven’t shared with any of you in regards to things he’s said, done, inferred, implied, whatever. This man is terrified of commitment and making a mistake. This man has honestly treated me better than anyone ever has in the past. This man has made me happier than anyone else in the past. And has made me the saddest. Things are a bit convoluted at the moment, and although I know I’ve said it in the past, I mean it this time. I need to let him, it and my hopes of a future with TD go. So, what was that horrible phrase? What did he say to me that pretty much crushed any lingering hope I might have held onto? He simply said:
I’m just not excited by the thought of having a relationship with you