43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Funny, I Didn’t Think My Pics Made Me Look Like A Whore……… March 9, 2012

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 4:58 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Apparently they do though as I have been quite the hot property on Plenty of Felons this week.  And only 2 of the messages so far have been overtly lewd.  One being from a darling 26 year old who is 2 inches shorter than I am who called me stunning and then proceeded to ask if I was sensual.  Misspelled, of course.  Oh wait, did I forget to tell you that I put a profile back up on Plenty of Fools?  Oops.  My bad.  I did.  I figure if I’m going to dive halfheartedly back into online dating, I’m going to go for the dregs free sites 1st and see what happens.  As it is, nothin’ too exciting is happening.  Aside from one 😉

And it isn’t this guy:

Hello again!

Are you hungry? No need for any more protracted and incessant texts or emails

Please forgive my belated reply as business demands have been all consuming. Additionally, am frequenting this site less and less. It appears to me that there are too many hearts broken in the world on this website that can’t be mended left unattended. What can we do?

I offer a monogamous, but never monotonous, adoring and dynamic relationship. All my attention is focused on my woman. Your income does not impress me, your outcome does. Looks don’t do it, likes do. Sense of humor and gray matter matters.

Perhaps you would agree that teasing is well and good if pleasing is included, okay?
Let’s get off of here!

Such a very random and strange message to send anyone that has contacted you before.  Even stranger considering I”VE NEVER CONTACTED HIM!

Then there is sweet Alex.  Sweet, unemployed, cut and pasted form letter sending Alex:

“The eyes are the window to the soul.” What a proverb which applies to you! My gosh you have the most gorgeous eyes even in a photo. I can only imagine in person they must be breathtaking!! You are beautiful!…However I know there is much more to you than looks.

I welcome you to read my profile and see if we can “aim” for friendship first.

I am a healer (studied under a retired chiropractor for 4 years)and after 7 months just graduated from massage school! I am now looking for the right p/t work with a chiropractor and starting up my own practice. If you read my profile you’ll read more about my healing with just my hands. No worries I’m self-sufficient (live on my own & take care of my own bills etc.)

Perhaps we can talk over a coffee or something…and see how our chemistry goes…keep first meeting simple. I make a great friend too!

~Alex

“One is not what one says to be. One is what one demonstrates one to be”. ~Unknown

Then there is Randy.  Randy who sent me a very sweet and complimentary message and signs it ‘your new admirer’.  Randy who lives in another state.  And whose entire profile consists of “smart and funny…………”

And lastly worth mentioning is Mr. Body-Builder-CPA.  He actually writes a decent message.  In proper ‘letter’ form.  Complete with salutation, proper spelling and grammar.  Sure, his 1st message to me consisted all of ‘cute’ period, but since then, he’s been awfully normal.  I assume it’s just a matter of time before I am on the receiving end of one of his more ‘private’ pics or lewd suggestions.  Maybe not though.  And yes, I actually did respond to his stellar initial message.  What can I say?  I liked his profile!

So to wrap up week one of being back online; I have had no one particularly strike my interest and I am celebrating that fact with a big night of laundry and tv with the dogs.  Who’s with me?! 😉

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8 Responses to “Funny, I Didn’t Think My Pics Made Me Look Like A Whore………”

  1. stevesw Says:

    OK, so what is more important in this dating decision, A) a body-builder (read ego, probably does not drink or eat anything but protein shakes) CPA who can spell and punctuate, or B) “(I) just graduated from massage school!” (read free massages) and the icing on the cake is “(I’m) self-sufficient (live on my own & take care of my own bills etc.)”, a possible sign of maturity?

    • Haha, he doesn’t drink! Damn him! Always nice to have a designated driver though, right? Although the offer of free massages from bachelor #2 is tempting and all, the fact that he had to actually explain what self sufficient is earned a few demerits 😉 I think for now though, I’ll go with option C. None of the above.

  2. TikkTok Says:

    Whoa! His woman? I can’t keep up with all the innuendos when I’m tired. I’d be afraid I got it wrong…… Well, gosh, he sounds, um, hungry. 😀

    #2, I’d vote for him. At least get a few massages and see. While he’s looking for the right practice, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have some other job. Although, I do wonder why someone would study (especially for 4 years!) under someone who was retired…… AND!!! He heals with more than just his hands??? !!!!!! He deserves a date. Maybe even two.

    Randy sounds promising. Smart and funny are good.

    Mr. Muscle might be good for just picking things up and putting them down. You’ll have to think about whether or not you want to, well, um, ya. 😆

  3. lifeandothermisadventures Says:

    Ugh, POF is the worst! Always worth a laugh, though 🙂

  4. 1smiles Says:

    Laughing is good, no matter where it comes from. I have to agree about POF.. not the cream of he crop. I found alot of married men on that site that were ‘hiding’ in the ranks. Looking for ‘friends’.


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