43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Playing Hard To Get November 14, 2012

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 1:19 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Oh please, do you really think I do that?  You should know by now that if I like a guy, I pretty much put it all out there (and inevitably send him screaming in the opposite direction).  I don’t play games (which,  in and of itself, is probably some sort of a game).  If there is any perception by anyone that I ever play hard to get, then chances are, I’m just not interested.  I don’t hesitate to call a guy, which I know is not the ‘best’ thing in the world to do, but whatever.  I don’t hesitate to tell someone I had a good time (if I did).  I don’t hesitate to suggest getting together again.  I realize these are all pretty bad things to do as I’ll never know if he really wants to see me again, or if he’s just going along with my suggestion.  I don’t do this all the time.  In fact, I rarely do it as I rarely actually like anyone I go out with above and beyond deeming them sufficiently non moronic enough for a 2nd chance.
As all two of you know, I had 3 dates in the last week or so.  Date #1 was tall and funny and I kinda liked him.  He suggested we go out again and then promptly fell off the face of the earth.  I texted him a quick ‘check in’ the following week to be met with an enthusiastic ‘thanks for checking in!  we definitely have to get together again’!  Yey me.  Until he fell off the face of the earth again.  Now, while I am more than willing to check in once and am more than willing to believe someone when they say they’ve been swamped with work and kids, I am NOT willing to follow up a second time or give a second chance should he fall off the face of the earth again.  And he did.  Awesome.

Burger date #1 from Friday went well.  He was funny and sweet and shared his burger with me.  We had a great time and he suggested we get together again.  And then fell off the face of the earth.

Burger date #2 from Friday went okay.  He suggested we get together again which I was still on the fence about.  Until he took that decision out of my hands and also fell off the face of the earth.

While I know that people are busy with lives and work and kids and dogs and whatever, I also know that if they had any sort of enthusiasm about me, they would touch base with me in the next couple of days.  And NONE of them have.  Gone, apparently, are the days of ‘good mornings’ or ‘how is your day going’ or ‘have a good night’ text messages from guys.  At least from guys that I go out with.  Apparently my suspicions are true.  I am an awesome first date when I don’t give a crap about the guy.  Apparently I am also easily forgettable in that I’m not quite awesome enough for a 2nd date.  Am I sad about about any of these guys?  Nope.  Am I surprised?  A little bit.  Will I call or text any of them?  Hell no.

Hard to get?  I am now………… 😉


15 Responses to “Playing Hard To Get”

  1. Citygirl Says:

    You sound pretty good about the whole thing, which you should. It certainly has nothing to do with you, but still it leaves you wondering what the hell? But you never know, you might hear from one or all of them a few weeks down the road. Men, I have found, have no concept of time and can’t understand that we might like to hear from sooner rather than later.

    • Thanks CG ….. it’s just annoying is all …. i may hear from one or two eventually, but geesh 😉 and no, I don’t really care either way ….. at least I’m $40 closer to having my memberships paid for :-X

  2. ifUseekAmy Says:

    I agree with Citygirl – men have no concept of time. Weeks can go by and they’ll think it’s only days. But I’m glad you are taking it all in stride and not too seriously. He’s out there for you. You’ll find him. xoxo

    • Thanks Amy. I really kinda think that I might be one of those people that is meant to be alone. I don’t mean that to sound pathetic or all ‘woe is me’, but it may be true. Or else I need to move to Maine …. whichever 😉

      • ifUseekAmy Says:

        Sometimes…okay, often, I think that too. My life is less complicated and less stressful being alone. I do what I want. I don’t have to answer to anyone. But then I wish someone was there to take care of my ‘needs’. I need to move someplace where I can have a pool boy.

  3. Hard to get is the best way to be. And its totally not you, it’s them. Not one of them deserves your awesomeness 🙂

  4. lafinwitu65 Says:

    Generally speaking if we like you, we WILL let you know.

    We suffer from the same issues that girls do. We agonize over how many days to wait to txt or call So we dont appear needy or desperate.

    No one ever wants to say (or hear) “I like you, you are an awesome person, but not quite what I am looking for.” so they fade into the ethernet to avoid creating that awkward situation.

    If this was easy, we would all our dream dates

    Your awesomeness is simply awesome!! and def not a figment of anyones imagination.

    • Thanks Lafin’! Maybe I just don’t ‘translate’ well to non-smart-asses 🙂 Good thing I wasn’t actually counting on much from any of them ….. I think my newly reclaimed ‘dating apathy’ will come in handy this holiday season! 🙂

  5. I’ve had plenty of guys fall off the face of the earth before and after meeting. I stopped getting upset over it too. Some online daters are just a little flighty. With a little luck it turns out well. I don’t do the hard to get thing and I’m comfortable calling and messaging men, but it can be a drag to be the initiator for all the dates. I tend to let those relations fizzle out on their own accord. Better they drop off the earth now, rather than having them do it six months of time and effort later. I just had a pof meeting go we, first date is this friday.. I think!

  6. This has happened to me as well. I think a lot of times a guy realizes the girl isn’t going to sleep with him on the first or second date. So he doesn’t want to put any effort into it and it’s on to the next one that might do that. I agree with DNB, better now than they waste your time and do it six months down the road.

  7. Matthew Says:

    What they all said. 🙂

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