The Life & Times of a 54 Year Old Online Dater

Thoughts on My Experiences In Search of Love & Companionship, 10 Years Running

Flat On My Back ……. Or, As If I Needed Another Reason To Hate FB December 28, 2012

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 4:02 pm
Tags: , , , , ,

What have I been up to?  Nothing good; that’s for sure.  Nothing that doesn’t involve me being flat on my back.  Minds out of the gutter people.  I could be so lucky.  I threw my back out.  And no, not doing anything fun, dammit.  I did it working.  Job #2.  Which I already kinda hated but knew I needed it for a reason.  Now I’m physically unable to do it and need to pull my shit together and either suck it up and deal with it, or start renewing my love of ramen noodles.  🙂 Okay, so it’s not that bad.  Yet.  But we all know how overly dramatic I like to be.

As I’ve been absent for a few weeks, one would assume it’s because I’ve finally told TD to fuck off and I’ve been in a funk because of it.  Too bad that’s only half accurate.  Guess which half?

Here’s a hint.  He actually wants me to meet the closet dweller.  Really?  He thinks it would make things easier on him if she met me.  Of course it will.  She doesn’t trust him.  She doesn’t trust me.  She’s jealous of me.  She drives by his house and gets pissed every time she sees my car there.  He’s banned me from the house since Christmas.  When she accused him of cheating on her with me.  Again.  Who knew I was being timed and that she was pissed when she did an ‘accidental’ drive by (he lives in a cul-de-sac, by the way) at 10am and she saw my car there.  Imagine how pissed she was when she did another accidental drive by (probably just one of many more that day) and saw my car still there at 10pm?  Along with 10 other cars that belonged to his family members.  She obviously isn’t the smartest apple on the tree as she accused him of cheating on her.  With me.  While not only his entire extended family was in the house, but all of his kids as well.  Uhm ….. if there was something to hide, could she not even give us enough credit to put my car in his garage?  Or around the block?  Apparently she’s an accomplished facebook stalker too (shush, I’m just better at it).  She’s seen his posts, my posts, his pictures, my pictures and all alse for the past year+.  She’s always known about me.  Why would she even start something with him if she thought I was anything more than a friend?  Why would she not trust him after this long?  At least a little bit?  Why would she whine and moan about all my pictures of all of us together as well as all of my postings that have anything to do with his family?  Best yet, why the hell would she get mad when she saw that I blocked her (within 2 hours, thank you very much)?  That I was tired of having to ‘watch’ what I said or the pictures I posted because she would get mad at him (and mind you, we’re talking completely innocent things here).  It’s now been requested that I unblock her.  So she can go back to checking my page multiple times a day.

He enables her to be so paranoid.  He excuses her inexcusable behaviour again and again.  He justified her ‘drive bys’.  He justified her paranoia.  He justified the fact that by meeting me, she will trust him more.  Apparently based on my sparkling personality more than his own merits?  So annoying.  So yes, I am banned from his house.  He knows that if she sees my car in his driveway, she’ll dump him.  Naturally I questioned him about this imposed ban.  And sort of told him to fuck off and that I was tired of taking the blame for her insecurities.  Oh wait, did I forget to mention that he literally screamed at me on X-Mas?  And dis-invited me the next day?  And blamed me for everything?  And blames her for nothing?  And has now played the ‘I’d do anything for you because I’m your friend’ card on me in order to get me to meet her?  And when I told him where he could shove his brilliant idea and how dare he put me in that situation, that he then reached for the ‘you must still have feelings for me card?’  And when I told him that none of this was fair to me to be blamed for everything and be made to take the brunt of all his frustrations regarding everything (work, life, her, me, kids, crazy key wielding ex girlfriend next door neighbor) and that I was sick of it that he actually acknowledged how unfair all of this is to me?  That he feels horrible and knows he’s putting me in an unfair spot that pretty much has no ‘good’ outcome where I am concerned?  And that since I’m such a pathetic pushover and in the end just want everyone to be happy (aside from myself apparently) that I agreed?

Yes ladies and gentleman; I’m just that pathetic.  And wish them the best of luck in their fucked up mistrustful, paranoid, ridiculous relationship……. I can’t really think of anything that I’d like to do less than to meet her.  Even if I never had feelings for him, I still thinks she kinda sucks for testing him all the time and making him work so hard.  Then again, I think he kinda sucks for allowing her to do it.  And for putting me in the middle of it all.  😦

The only caveat I put on this amazing meeting (don’t you wish I could u-tube the whole fucked up thing?) was that it had to be somewhere that had a bar.  And that he was paying.  Monetarily of course, as we all know who’ll get footed with the emotional bill that comes out of all of this while they ride happily into the sunset together ….. he may have actually pushed me too far this time ………… maybe


9 Responses to “Flat On My Back ……. Or, As If I Needed Another Reason To Hate FB”

  1. I hope you make a new years resolution to eject this douchebag from your life. He’s not your friend and enjoys the drama. You’re better than this!

    • Thanks Mary. You’re right. And I will. Just as soon as I get him to install my new ceiling fan (’cause apparently as long as I’m not at his house, it doesn’t count …… idiot) … him, not you 😉

  2. everevie Says:

    You know…you don’t have to put yourself through this.

    Although free drinks are always tempting. And come to think of it, I’m envisioning you walking in: Slow motion…in a hot dress…sky-high heels…flipping your shiny hair and smiling your kickass smile. Hmmm…yeah…I def see how she’ll feel better after meeting you. Lol.

    • You’re right my friend and you better bet your ass I’m going to do everything I can to make her feel like the mousy lunch lady that she is …… who apparently likes whore-ish lingerie ….. don’t ask how I know *gag* …… she may ‘get’ TD in the end, but I’ll either know that she doesn’t deserve him …… or that maybe she does …..

  3. Gigi!!!! Are you effing kidding me right now? Ok, true, I’ve had one too many cocktails tonight, but apparently it gave me the cajones to tell you how I really feel. A.) Why would you agree to such an asinine thing, unless you love the drama (and emotional abuse from that douche!?) B.) Why are you his puppet? Take your dignity back and tell him to go f*#k a closet dwelling lunch lady!!! Those two deserve one another! That relationship was doomed as soon as he started dating her. He preys upon emotionally weak women, because he can’t make a commitment….to ANYONE! So he puts you all on a puppet strings and plays you all on a stage.

    I wish you could just fall out of love with this idiot. “Stop excusing his inexcusable behavior.” Wanna get a different perspective?…talk to his ex wife and find out the real story. I realize I’m not there and there are 3 sides to every story. His, hers, and the truth…but you are a smart, reasonable (beautiful) person and you can reasonably extract the bullshit and see him for what he really is. D-O-U-C-E-B-A-G! That doesn’t deserve your love….let alone your friendship. He gives nothing in return! He just takes!

    Hope you aren’t pissed at me for telling you how I feel. I sorta see you as a friend (even though I don’t know you on a personal level.) Just couldn’t hold it in on this one. Please don’t hate me.

    • Apparently, the “one too many” cocktails also gave me the ability to spell incorrectly and make grammatical errors. Doucebag….hahaha I kinda like it better! At least he makes for great writing material. I’d kinda miss him if he wasn’t the star of your blogs….nah, not really!

      • Never pissed at anyone for telling me how they feel Heels. Thank you for your honesty. Something else happened last night that he involved his kids in, so I did tell him to fuck off. As far as the taking my dignity back part though; I fear that will take a while as he certainly did a number on me …….. it’s not that I never realized what was going on with him, it’s that I gave him too much credit for caring about me …… he doesn’t. He cares about himself and what makes things easiest for him. I have certainly made things easy for him for over a year now (well, aside from the past month or so where I’ve just kinda made his life hell as a payback) 😦 The closet dweller can fight her own battles as I’m done taking the blame for everything …… they’re both on their own now

  4. SillyG Says:

    GG gotta join the choir here. He is a dick for leading you on and pulling you into his relationships. You deserve so much better. Don’t go for that drink….

    • Yes Silly, he is a dick. With a capital D. When everything came to a head last night (again), he blamed me for all of it. Every single bit of it. I know I don’t deserve that. Let’s see if I stick to my guns this time …….

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