The Life & Times of a 54 Year Old Online Dater

Thoughts on My Experiences In Search of Love & Companionship, 10 Years Running

2013 Cliff’s Notes January 7, 2013

OMG, am I really posting my FOURTH year of these?  Kill me now!  Oh wait, all the discouraging online dates are slowly doing that as it is …….. So it’s now January 7th, 2013.  TD has broken my heart for the last time (and just to get his point across has also let me know that he always viewed the friendship as temporary) and I was actually just waiting for my online dating site memberships to expire when low and behold, a couple men made it past my bullshit radar …….. Who knows?  As 2012 was a craptastic year for dates (’cause I was still ‘hoping’ that TD would ‘see the light’), there’s still a very slight chance that I could go on more than 1 consecutive date with the same guy this year!  Yey me.  Ugh.

Airline Mechanic ~ E-Harmony ~ no, really.  And he plays the drums.  He sends lots of texts, so at the very least it’s a good distraction.  Meeting up next week ……. actually not, I cancelled on him the night before.  I sent him a very nice text saying that although he seemed like an amazing guy, I was afraid we didn’t have enough in common.  And I wished him well and good luck in his search.  He sent back ‘fine’.  Apparently I made the right decision.

Vodka Man ~ E-Harmony ~ no, he’s not an alcoholic (that I know of).  He’s works in finance at the corporate office for a liquor distribution company.  He’s funny, sarcastic, blunt and from New York.  Uhm ………. met for a drink the other night.  All 6’3″ of him.  And his weak chin.  I can’t do weak chins.  Plus he has MAJOR food issues.  There will not be a date #2.

Vegas Showgirl ~ Match ~ no, he’s not actually one, but was dumb enough to put a profile picture up of him with one draped all over him …. we’re meeting for coffee on Sunday…. okay coffee went well.  Not sure we have a ton in common but we did laugh a lot and I (thank god) could actually imagine kissing him (and that hasn’t happened in WAY too long) so I’m guessing that means I’ll never hear from him again 😉

Tahoe ~ Match ~ he made a comment (a nice one) on one of my profile pics and as I was bored today, I responded.  He may actually have a sense of humor! …. spoke on the phone …. he lives kinda far but we’re going to meet and ‘see’ when he gets back from his business trip (bonus! he travels a couple times a month on business, so it may take him longer than most to bug the crap out of me) 😉 I know, I suck.  We met, we ate, we laughed, we’re done.  He’s shorter than I am and awfully boring.

Boring Tall Guy ~ E-Harmony ~ lucky isn’t he?  I don’t really know enough about him to name him anything else at this point.  I’ve opted to throw caution to the wind though and I’m just going to send my phone number out to these guys and see what happens.  He seems nice enough, so hopefully I won’t be getting a ‘package pic’ anytime soon …..

January 21st, 2013 ~ Match profile hidden and E-Harmony profile deleted!! 🙂 Yey me!  For now, anyway ……. ‘un-hid it two weeks later …….

Arkansas ~ seemingly nice guy from Match that lives uber far from me, has a crappy job & works even worse hours ~ he has been texting me nonstop since I gave him my phone number 5 days ago ~ way to get me to not actually meet you

The Golfer ~ from match ~ met up for a drink and had a great time ~ laughed a lot and had a lot in common ~ he asked me if I wanted to go to a hockey game *score! finally a 2nd date* and I said yes ~ and then aside from a very nice text that night and the next morning, I haven’t heard from him again *sigh*

Lucky Charms ~ match ~ cute little Irish ginger that I met for drinks ~ we had a great time ~ talked non stop ~ he asked me out again and of course, never followed through ~ a friend of mine texted him from my phone a week after our date and he responded right away, but nothing since.  as that was over 4 weeks ago, I guess I’ll stop holding my breath.

Mr. Opinion ~ match ~ went to to meet him on a day that I had the flu and a migraine (yes, lucky man) as he sounded really interesting ~ in he walked and damn if he wasn’t handsome to boot.  We had a really good time, he asked me if I’d like to go out again at the end of the date and, as is par for the course, never followed through.  Boo

Tall Guy ~ match ~ yup, that’s the stellar name he gets and he should consider himself lucky that I didn’t name him something ‘better’ ~ he stood me up!  dumbass

The Pilot ~ match ~ started messaging him when he was in Tokyo on a 4 day layover.  he suggested we ride on his motorcycle to a little town up in the mountains for breakfast.  As that sounded like a ridiculous thing to do with a stranger off the internet, I agreed. 😉 Had an okay time ~ there’s just something about him that doesn’t sit well with me and I can’t figure out what it is.  Apparently I don’t need to as although he asked for a 2nd date as well, I’ve not heard from him in 5 days.

The Teacher ~ match ~ started out kinda ADD on me and then turned a bit more charming ~ took over a week to coordinate a time to meet due to the fact that we were both uber busy with work.  Met at a darling little Mexican place for a beer & shared a cheese crisp.  He was nice & cute & funny.  I couldn’t get a good read on him but thought things were going ‘okay’ (not stellar, but not horrible either).  About an hour in and just when I’m about to chalk it up to 1st date nerves and hopefully date #2 will be more relaxed, he says ‘so let’s wrap this up and get out of here’.  Whoops, guess I’m wrong ……

Dr AWESOME ~ match ~ a strange little man with a penchant for CAPITALIZING random words like AWESOME and AMAZING in not only his profile, but also his text messages.  Met him for coffee and couldn’t get out of there fast enough.  His motivational speeches must be on how everyone aside from him is a sloth as he was uber judgemental and didn’t have much of anything good to say about anyone.  Although I had a fun time sparring with him (note: motivational speakers don’t like to be challenged on any of their questionable viewpoints), it was a big ole’ waste of time.


3 Responses to “2013 Cliff’s Notes”

  1. Gina Says:

    I too am 43 and single (6 years celibate) and currently dating. I have only one suggestion. STOP THE ONLINE DATING. There is something desperate about a woman searching for men… They know just by you being on there that you are lonely and they tend to treat it like a buffet. Which is why even when things seem to be going ok they disappear, because there are so many other lonely women to choose from. Online dating makes you an option. Think about it. That is not what you want. You desire to be somebody’s one and only. Just like when you meet someone you are feeling good about and hope things will go further that’s what you want him to feel as well. You are setting yourself up every time, Simply because from the time you log on YOU ARE AN OPTION. Online dating should be for entertainment only. Something to do when you have nothing to do. But never as a means to actually meet that special someone. (If you get lucky) Then whoopee!

    Think about what I’m saying…
    There are so many ways and places to meet men. Without looking like you are wearing a sign. They love the chase and believe it or not you take that away just by having an online profile. Just by hanging out at Sporting Events, Bowling, Sports Bars ect.. (everywhere men are) You may not meet someone every time. But honestly it only takes once.

  2. Pl Says:

    Brava! You’re smart and funny – love your dating stories…I’m the Dating at 50 Specialist in San Francisco – and having so much fun! Write on.

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