I have TWO dates this week! Okay, not dates, but 1st meetings. Calling them dates makes me feel like not quite such a loser though. Both of the guys contacted me from the same dating site. Not to name drop, but it rhymes with Me Harp-On-Me. Ugh, I suck at rhyming. Anyway, they both contacted me on Friday and I almost didn’t respond to either. There is a list of ‘must have’s’ on that sucky site that you exchange with one another and both, BOTH had ‘sexually knowledgeable’ as one of their 10. Really? Out of the 40 or so options to choose from, they chose that one? I guess I really am a prude in my old age because I got offended. And then figured they were probably married to frigid bitches in the past and as guys usually suffer from (sorry guys) foot-in-mouth syndrome, I opted to give them both a pass on that. Until they both selected another somewhat ‘suggestive’ question to send out of the pre-written choices. As I realized I had the same question that I sent out, I let it go. 😉
One has been texting me all day and is definitely pushing my boundaries of what I’m looking for. He lives far, his hair is too long, he has a weirdly long goatee, he’s blue collar and he has pictures of his drum set on his profile. As I know all of these things are bitchy of me to pick on, I gave myself a stern talking to. Hair can be cut. Goatees can be shaved off
in their sleep. At least he’s employed and a hard worker. Too bad I’m fairly certain that he’s not my type. I’m not making it very easy on him though and I’m not sure that we have enough in common, but I’ll never know if I don’t at least try, right? We’re meeting next Monday.
Bachelor #2 may be my match. In the smart ass department. He works for a beverage supply company (hello? Grey Goose?) in the corporate finance department. He’s funny. He’s blunt. He’s sarcastic. He thinks I’m funny (and hopefully not just in the looks department). And he’s tall. Best part? He texted me a good morning this morning. He texted me a ‘how was your day’ when he got off work. He then actually picked up the phone and dialed my number! We had a fun conversation on the phone. What does he have going against him, you ask? And you know that everyone always has a ‘con’ list going with me ….. because I’m bitchy like that. I’m not sure I’ll be attracted to him. And, more importantly ……. he has food issues. Like major picky eater syndrome. And doesn’t like cheese. I’m thinking his vodka connections may outweigh the food stuff though. We’re meeting on Thursday.
As I’m apparently not as attractive, funny, loveable or awesome as I had once hoped, maybe it’s time for me to stop being so fucking picky. I’m sure I can do better than a self involved, hurtful hottie who takes every opportunity to put me down while simultaneously doing really nice ‘things’ for me in an awesome ‘smoke and mirrors’ kinda routine he has going.