Stop yelling at me. I know, I know. Nothing will ever change if I don’t MAKE it change. Things will never get better if I don’t actually follow through on my committment to end everything. I know it’s insane to keep repeating old patterns and expect a different outcome. I know I’m absolutely certifiable for trying again. What can I say, I’m a hopeless romantic. I DO believe that if I keep trying, that things will get better. That things will improve. That past mistakes will be forgiven and future ones will be minimized. As much as I wished that I could, I just can’t let go. At least not now. I’ve made so many excuses in the past, so I won’t bore you with my current ones.
Absolutely ridiculous of me to try again and I am certain I will end up alone when all is said and done, but I have to give it one more shot. One last chance. I hope that my blind optimism doesn’t come back to hurt me more than I already am. I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t. I tried. I tried really hard.
And now we all will have to pay the price by hearing me whine and moan about how awful things are. Again and still. Because although I had every intention of ending things for good tonight, Match.com offered me another 3 months for the price of 1. I just couldn’t pass it up.
What?!? You all thought I was giving TD another shot? HELL NO on that one! 😉
(my profile is currently hidden though as I do need a serious break, but when I’m ready to dive back into the cesspool, my new cheap as hell membership will be waiting for me …….. at least until April 23rd, that is)