43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Conspiracy Theory March 12, 2013

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 4:35 pm
Tags: , , ,

I am not one to think along these lines.  I never think that anyone/anything is ‘out to get me’.  That people will go out of their way to make my  life hell.  Well, aside from my theory that the universe is out to test my last nerve when it comes to finding ‘my one’.  Or that the powers that be insist on me choosing poorly when it comes to potential mates (what? that’s actually my own doing?).  Or that the Closet Dwelling Lunch Lady was the final straw in the precarious TD pyramid.  Aside from that though, I pretty much believe that, however hard it is at times, that everything happens for a reason.  Those reason aren’t always easy to see or clear in any way, but they’re there.

I’ve had a horrible run of bad luck online lately.  Sure, I understand that it’s a game of numbers.  I understand that men and women contact as many people as humanly possible and see what happens (sort of like throwing shit at the wall to see what sticks).  I understand that people change their mind.  Or get bored.  Or are just assholes.  None of these guys were assholes though.  I don’t think.  They all initiated contact.  They all sent multiple fun, flirty and sweet messages.  None were inappropriate.  None gave me any reason to be concerned.  All had me, to varying degrees, interested.  All (The Golfer, The Teacher, The Water Toys Guy) sent me the last message.  And then immediately (or it would seem) blocked me.  What I don’t understand is why?  And why are so many guys doing this to me lately?

There is an option on match to remove people from future searches so you never have to see their profile again.  They can still find you though, but pretty much, out of sight is out of mind.  I’ve clicked on that little ‘x’ on the top left hand corner of their thumbnail profile.  No biggie.  To actually ‘block’ someone takes a bit of effort though.  You have to go to a certain area and type in the person’s user name.  Going this route prevents them from showing up in your searches.  Or from contacting you initially. I’ve only used that option for the chosen few pervs and assholes.  Never someone who I’ve just gotten bored with.

This has happened to me sporadically in the past, but lately, it seems that every man who I am communicating with blocks me.  I have no clue why.  Our messages are fun.  They were encouraging.  They left me wanting to know more.  Now let me tell you a little secret about online daters.  Many google search the hell out of people.  I am NOT one of those people.  If I want to know something, I just ask.  I don’t click on people’s profiles incessantly.  I respond when messaged.  I don’t play games.  Each and every one of these guys sent me the last message.  Each and every one of them told me how much they liked my personality.  Or looks.  Or sense of humor.  All of them complimented me.  And each and every one of them apparently blocked me immediately after sending those last messages.  Why?

Do they take what little they know about me (only one had my phone number, none know my last name) and google me?  Do they find something horrible?  Does it take them to my FB page smattered with photos of TD and his kids?  Does it lead them to this blog?  Is someone hacking my match account and ‘warning’ any guy that contacts me that they should run for the hills?  Sure, I’ve been blocked by random guys in the past.  Annoying to be sure, but no biggie.  For it to have happened with every single guy that I’ve messaged with in the past 2 weeks though is quite the mystery.

To be hit with the ever awesome ‘additional profile information is unavailable’ spelled out across the big empty page that used to contain their profile (you can see part of it in the message strands) is just rude.  And saddening.  😦 What these Einsteins don’t realize however is that although ‘blocking’ someone from seeing your profile prevents them from originating a message, it is still possible to just respond to their message in order to contact them.  Duh.

I mean really people.  A sweet school-teacher who tells me what a sweetheart I am;  A fun guy that tells me how much he loves my personality already and looks forward to meeting me;  A guy who invites me on a 2nd date ……..all blocked me!  Is this normal?


* and yes, I’ve googled my screen name … I’ve googled bits and pieces of my ‘information’… nothing comes up …. my phone number leads people to my business website, but as I don’t sell/film/participate in porn, there shouldn’t be anything offensive there …… oh wait, maybe I should  participate in that realm of ‘entertainment’ … maybe then everyone would stop blocking me 😉


10 Responses to “Conspiracy Theory”

  1. What the hell??? Totally sounds bizarre to me. No one else has knowledge or access to your computer?

    • It’s driving me insane trying to figure it out! No one has access to my computer …….. and my dogs don’t have much knowledge of computers 😉 It’s just TOO big of a coincidence for it to be happening by chance………..

  2. Have you tried any of the other sites like OK Cupid? I found Match to be riddled with men who had no intention of ever getting into a relationship and had great luck with OK Cupid.

    • Hi Mary! I have tried ‘all’ the sites 😦 Ok Cupid (that I have lovingly nicknamed Ok Stupid) was okay a couple of years ago for me, but I took my profile down about a year ago as I was getting too many random ickies …. Glad your luck was/is better on there than mine!

  3. Citygirl Says:

    That is so strange. After reading this, I went on the internet and googled myself, lol! We’ve got to be more mindful of what we put out there because it’s so permanent. But that is a strange coincidence. I never had much luck with Match and I am surprised that guys would pay for a membership if they have no intention of meeting and getting into a relationship with a woman they meet on there. I would try OK Cupid too. I’ve had more luck meeting some ok (no pun intended) guys on there.

    • Haha, on the googling yourself. I would think that a paid site would have more ‘serious’ people on there, but I guess not anymore …… Poo, I may have to create a new profile on OkStupid 😉

  4. Jacs Says:

    I had gone through the same thing, I felt that maybe I was saying something to ‘tip’ them off onto a negative side of me, or I was saying the words “lets get married tmrw” between the lines of my getting to know you messages. Its a mystery, and as I said in my latest post, manners are a thing of a past. So frustrating why common manners go out the window with online dating because they never have to actually face you. The guise of the internet does wonders for people’s apparent need to ‘grow balls’.

    • There was nothing on either side (there’s or mine) that would have caused me concern ….. all messages were fun and playful ….. that’s why it’s so annoying! Yup, manners don’t seem to be around much anymore 😦

  5. CP Says:

    I didn’t care for match, but that was a couple of years ago. I’m on pof, which I know a lot of people don’t like, but I’ve had good luck on it. I was getting multiple emails from different men daily, and then a few weeks ago, it slowed down to a trickle, with maybe five or so a week. Maybe it’s just a natural cycle that there are periods of plenty interrupted with periods of drought. I’ve never been blocked, however. It does seem inappropriate to the situations you describe. Hmmmm.

    • Hi CP! POF is horrible in my town. Totally used for hookups and quite the hot site if you’re interested in a getting a ‘package’ picture sent to you. I never had good luck on there and finally just got too creeped out.

      I could totally understand being blocked if I was being pushy or needy or weird or anything else concerning, but I wasn’t and they seemed to enjoy communicating with me ……. until they didn’t *sigh*

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