43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Tweekers Suck! April 18, 2013

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 12:05 pm

Did I even spell that right?  So I’m working my 2nd job yesterday, while trying not to cry regarding you know who (shush, I’ll get better, I promise) when this little doggie prances by me.  No collar, no tags, just prancing down the sidewalk of a busy street.  No, by the way, I am not a street walker you dirty minded pervs.  Nor do I work for the city scraping gum off the ground.  Anyway, I go get the doggie and it’s this adorable little Chihuahua.  Very sweet.  Very small.  Very skinny.  As I’m carrying him around some dumbass on the street corner tells me the dog’s owner is inside the building.  Uhm, okay ….. why are you leaving your dog to run around wild and potentially get hit by a car?  I’m getting all set to give whoever a piece of my mind when out walks this …… person.  Female, I think, in filthy clothes and no shoes.  She says something to me and I have no clue what language it is.  Not English.  Not Spanish.  Possibly Swahili.  WTF?  As she seems totally out of it, I decide to yell at her to watch her dog or I was going to take him.  To which she responded with god knows what.  I hand her the dog and went back to work.  I then see her put the dog down again.  Okay, enough is enough.  I went and grabbed the dog and just held him while I did my work.  What a little sweetie!  The dog, btw, not the owner.  Well the owner weaves over to me, spits on me and starts yelling in her own special nothing language at me.  I tell her to get away from me so she takes a step back, sways, collapses and then has a seizure right behind my car.  Again, WTF?!  I go inside and tell the manager to call 911 as I have no clue what’s going on.  All the while I’ve got this adorable dog in my arms that I’ve decided to keep and find a good home for.  Too bad I can’t get my car out to leave as she’s still laying on the ground in front of it drooling.  Now before you all think I’m a heartless bitch (that only happens on alternate Tuesdays and Thursdays and yesterday was Wednesday), I knew she was on drugs.  LOTS of them.

Anyway, the cops and the ambulance arrives and the cop recognizes her as a repeat ‘offender’ of getting strung out on heroin and passing out in convulsions.  Lovely.   He asks me if it’s my dog and I almost said yes, but didn’t really want my friends to read on the front page of the morning paper all about my dog-napping arrest (assuming it was a slow news day, of course), so I told him it was the person on the ground’s.  He said that she takes shitty care of the dog and I think was about to tell me to keep him when some stupid kid comes up and recognizes the dog.  As he promised to take the dog home to the druggie’s mom, the cop kinda ordered me to hand over the dog.  The kid grabs the dog by it’s front paws and is just kinda letting the dog hang.  At this point I decide I’ll risk getting in trouble and I get in the kid’s face (I say kid, but he was about 16) and tell him he better hold that dog correctly and be nice to it and make sure it’s taken care of or else I was going to come find him and take the dog.  The cop heard all of it and didn’t say anything to me to the effect of ‘shut up crazy lady, it’s just a dog’.

As I like dogs more than I do people, I was totally upset by the whole thing.  Not the fact that the icky lady was still laying in the parking lot mumbling incoherently thanks to her love of all things heroin, but the fact that I didn’t just take the dog.  😦  See?  I’m not a total bitch.  Just to people ……. 😉


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