43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Who Knew I Had A Conscience? May 16, 2013

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 5:03 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Oh, that’s right, I did.  Dammit.  For a cynical bitch, I have a surprisingly hard time shooting down nice guys.  Well, nice guys that aren’t 5’7″ tall and who don’t cancel on me the day of our supposed 1st date, that is.  Did I happen to mention that the short one messaged me a couple of days ago to see if I was still interested in meeting?  Over a week after cancelling on me and not hearing a word since.  Pretty sure he got the hint by my non-response.

So I was thinking of cancelling on The Carpenter for Sunday.  Sure, I want to see the new Star Trek movie (and no, I’m not a trekkie), but he just seems a bit too into me and I’m a bit too not into him.  I’m trying to abide by my ‘give the good guys a 2nd chance’ but all I can think about is him going in for a kiss and me cringing away.  What on earth happened to the carefree kissing whore that I used to be?  So just when I decided to take the lame way out and text him that I just didn’t think we had enough in common I get a text from him saying that he hopes my week is going great and he can’t wait for Sunday!  Oy.  Why, why, why can’t the good guys that I’m attracted to like me?  Oh, that’s right, they don’t exist……

Tomorrow is TD’s daughter’s high school graduation and I was resigned to the fact that I wasn’t invited until one of TD’s friends decided to message me on FB last night (the root of all evil) and bring it up.  And tell me he was going.  And ask if I was.  And tell me I should go anyway.  And to let me know that The Closet Dwelling Lunch Lady will be there.  As will TD’s ex wife (of course since she’s S’s mom).  Both of whom think less than nothing of me.  Because they’re jealous of me.  For having a great relationship with the kids and for having had heaven knows what sort of relationship with TD.  If only they knew.  I’m a bit heartbroken that I won’t be there and hope that S doesn’t think it’s because she’s not important to me because she is.  I actually considered going and TD’s ex and current would just have to deal with it, but the last thing in the world I want to do is to take the spotlight off of S on her special day and I fear that the rumor mill, gasps and finger pointings at me might actually overtake the real reason that everyone is there.  Just to make sure that she knows how important she is to me and because I don’t give a shit about what anyone else thinks when it comes to these kids, I’m going over to the house to see her tomorrow and to give her her gift before she leaves for her ceremony and party.  Am I still bitter that I wasn’t invited and can’t go?  You bet.  Would I have actually gone if I had been invited knowing I wasn’t all that welcome there?  I have no clue, but it should have been my decision to make.  There is one helpful thing that TD’s friend shared with me last night.  In that it just makes me pissed and that, in turn, makes me less sad and less weepy (which I’m actually doing fairly well on this week).  He told me that the reason TD gave him for me not talking to him anymore is because I don’t like Horse Face (aka the closet dwelling lunch lady).  Really?  He’s reduced EVERYTHING that we had and that has happened down to that simple blameless tidbit?  It’s not even true.  I guess TD opted to leave out the screaming that he did at me; the hissy fits and nasty texts that he’s sent me because of horse face.  I decided to take the high road and not fill in the friend on what really happened.  Ha!  Who am I kidding.  I sure as hell did in that I responded ‘ well that’s disappointing ….. i guess he opted to leave out the part about him yelling at me all the time and sending me nasty text messages?’.  Because I’m totally immature awesome like that. 😉

Anywhoo, as of 4:56pm on Thursday, movie date with The Carpenter is still on.  The Teacher is starting to bore me with lame e-mails and never actually wanting to follow thru on his suggestions to meet.  The cute one that I met and actually liked still has opted out of that 2nd date I thought/hoped was on the horizon in that I’ve not heard from him in over 3 weeks.  The Pilot has opted not to follow thru either.  Which I’m okay with.  I guess it’s either feast or famine on my end.  As it tends to lean more towards the famine side, I wish just a bit of that would rub off on my ass……


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