So there’s been this guy, not sure if I blogged about him or not last year who contacted me off of match and I opted out of meeting. Of course, because I’m uber mature, instead of just telling him I wasn’t interested, I told him I had a cold and then contact kinda just tapered off. Well, he’s sent me about 1 text per month since last July just ‘checking in’. He never used my name in any of them so I just assumed he was cleaning out his phone contacts and came across a name he hadn’t yet crossed off his list. I got a ‘Happy New Year’ last month. A ‘It’s been a long time, how come we never met up?’ a few weeks ago and a ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ on Friday. Of course, I never bothered responding to any of the messages so had to kinda love his
stupidity dedication. Last night, however, he sends a ‘I want to see you, let’s meet up tonight’. Uhm, no. I immediately send a text to a friend letting her know that he texted again and now wants me to go out but I bet he doesn’t know my name. Of course, being the huge idiot brilliant individual that I am, I accidentally sent that text to HIM instead of my friend. I can’t make this shit up people.
I felt the need to apologize for the misfired text and he was very gracious and what do you know? Actually did remember my name. He asked me out again and I declined. I then let him know that I was still recovering from a total knee replacement. He says that he had one too! And he actually used a surgeon that I almost chose, but didn’t. He offered to give me some pointers and tips on recovery since I seem to be in the remedial class of that. As I can use all the help I can get I agreed to meet him for breakfast this morning.
We met up and right away I knew I had made a mistake. I think he did to. The man looked everywhere but at me when he spoke. He asked when my surgery was and I told him it was 2 months ago. He proceeds to tell me it’s because my nutrition was bad. Uhm, do I look jaundiced? Why would he say that to me? I told him that I actually eat fairly well and that I eat a ton of vegetables. He asked me if I juice. That would be a resounding NO. Why would I want to drink a vegetable when I can eat it in it’s true form. He proceeds to tell me that eating vegetables is okay, but juicing them is better. Whatever. He then let’s me know about all the supplements he’s taking and how nutrition is tantamount in his daily life. Really? Cause he looked a bit gaunt and gangly to me. Anyway, after an hour of him making me feel like I was doing everything wrong or not trying hard enough in my recovery, he suggested we leave. I couldn’t have hobbled out of the restaurant fast enough.
Let this be a lesson to everyone that apparently juicing – not just one type of juice, but ALL kinds of juice – will cure anything and that proper nutrition is also key to a full life. Did I forget to mention that he put grape jelly on his bacon?!?!?