43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

I’d Like To Rescind That Wink Please October 7, 2014

Filed under: internet dating — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 11:49 am

As per usual, I am half assing my way through my 3 month membership on Match. I’m still kinda kicking myself for falling for their sly marketing tactics and apathetically deciding that $30 for 3 months wasn’t so bad. It has been. We all know that I base my cost/benefit analysis of online dating on a factor of how many cocktails it would take me to recoup my investment. I’m way behind this go around. 1 $5 coffee. Damn.

So anyway, I got a couple of winks yesterday and a couple of half assed messages. Who am I to judge, right? Oh wait, I do judge. Whoopsie. As I didn’t want to be rude (ha), I decided to send half assed replies. This is not my usual mode of operation and if something sends me a great message and I am interested, I will send an equally great (ish) response. Heck, I even send first contact messages! Anywhoo, I replied a gentleman who is slender (uhm, great, like I need anything else to make me feel like a fat sloth) who lives out of town as well as a tall guy who is, well, tall.

When you respond on match, they immediately post a few profiles at the bottom of the page of men you might be interested in based on their similarity to the one you just messaged. How kind of them. Up popped a guy who was okay looking, but whose pictures were cute, captions were funny and his profile didn’t read like a 2nd grader had written it. So I sent him a wink. While I was still reading. And right after I sent it, I get to the part that say, in all caps, ‘SLENDER WOMEN ONLY AND NO BLACKS’. I shit you not! I almost fell off my chair. What an ass!

Lesson learned. Read entire profile before contacting in any way. I’m now off to hang my head in shame for sending this tool a wink…..


5 Responses to “I’d Like To Rescind That Wink Please”

  1. Cheryl Says:

    In my experience just about every man, whatever his size, wants to date a slender woman. I’m sure we’ve all seen those men parading on the beach with their big guts, while next to them is a very attractive, slim woman. And I’m sure they see themselves as being in shape too. The secret for him is to never turn sideways in the mirror!

    But they don’t usually state it so baldly in their profiles. I can say that at least 80% of my dates from online mentioned dating horror stories that always involved women larger than they appeared in their photos.

    On the other hand, I once had a girlfriend who was overweight, even obese, and she would always go for the best looking guy in the place. I guess it’s good to have that much confidence? Unfortunately, she always got turned down, even by big guys!

    • Oh sure, I know men are visual creatures and they can be as delusional as they want and like what they like, but it was more the ‘no blacks’ in all caps that I found offensive.

      Larger, shorter, older than represented is sadly a common occurrence online…..

  2. Silly Says:

    Ack! Like everyone has their preferences but that is just an ass.

  3. Cheryl P Says:

    No recent dates to entertain us with? How have you been? I was thinking maybe you’d met the “right one,” fallen in love, and have been living blissfully ever since with no time to blog.

    • Oh, if only you could be in charge of writing my destiny Cheryl. 😉 I WISH that were the case, sadly not though. I haven’t written much because, well, there’s nothing much to write. Darn…..

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