So you remember all the guys I listed from week one? Off to a great start, huh? Yeah, no. I actually met one (yes, the coffee date that I invited my friend to). Now they’re all off the list. Either their fault or mine (probably more theirs though ;-)), they’re no longer options. Some were flakey, some were rude, some were slackers, 2 were uber nice, but couldn’t pull it together enough to actually keep things rolling or *gasp* ask me to meet.
As I’ve adopted the ‘mirror’ route instead of the ‘chase’ route this go around, I am not going to be the one that suggests meeting. Or keeps in touch when they don’t. If we’ve got a good exchange going and then they disappear, I will check in once. If I don’t hear back, then that’s that. Looking back, I spent a LOT of time trying to ‘move things along’ in the past. I did it with TD and probably did it with the 2 guys that I met and liked very much last year. I don’t want to be the chaser. I want to be the chase-ee!
So here we are, end of week 2 and I’ve written 2 very nice ‘I don’t think we’re a match’ messages and then sat back and waited for some sort of shitty response. I never got one. They were both very nice about it. The 1st, who I thought had promise despite living in a VERY scary part of time, turned out to have huge issues with not being over his ex yet. How do I know this? Well that’s because he spent the 1st 25 minutes of our 1st phone call bitching about her. When I pointed this out to him, he said ‘well, you asked’. Uhm, no. No I didn’t.
The 2nd I actually hated telling ‘no’ to as he seemed like a hugely sweet and thoughtful guy. He has a very sketchy past though and although everyone deserves a 2nd chance and I don’t hold people’s pasts against them, his was sketchy for a long time and he’s only been on the straight and narrow for less than a year. I can’t get involved with that. Not at this point. My inner ‘fixer’ wanted to jump all over that, but I think my ‘fixing’ days are over. They never end well. For me, at least. He was a sweetheart though.
I might actually be meeting someone for a drink next week that seems very cool and seems to have a lot of the same outlooks and sensibilities that I do (smart, snarky, employed; you know, the important stuff). He lives uber far from me, but I’m going to give it a shot anyway. That is, if he manages to answer a text message within 10 hours. 😉
To round things out I got a message for someone asking for my phone number. I politely responded that I don’t give my number out right away and asked him a few innocuous questions. His response was, in it’s entirety: ‘up to you about the phone number, I’m not on here often’ (when in fact he always appears ‘online now’). My next not so polite response was to say that unless he put some effort into writing me a message, he’d never get my number. I also threw in that it would be nice if he actually bothered to tell me what his name is. His response, and I shit you not, was ‘Tom. Can I have your phone number’. WTF? Needless to say, I never responded back. I have since gotten a wink, a ‘hi’ and a ‘like’ from him. He’s either the dumbest man alive or computer generated.
I haven’t been online or put much effort into it this week, so I’ll try harder next week. Maybe 😉