43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

Just Like Ordering A Pizza July 16, 2019

I’ve used this analogy to describe the Male (and yes, female too) mindset of online dating. It also describes the mindset of daters in general.  Thinking you can pick and choose the traits (toppings) you want for your mate (such a lame term). Mr. OoT is no exception.  Sure, everyone has some idea of what they want, but to have a specific list is, IMHO, insane.

As we all realize that Mr. OoT may be a bit insane himself, he is super specific in what he likes. Oddly so.  Not in important qualities like education, ability to hold a conversation, good heartedness or anything else that I would put at the TOP of my list.  These qualities would go at the bottom of his.  While he knows that a ‘dumb’ girl wouldn’t be able to hold his attention due to his love of a good debate, I’m pretty sure this other list trumps that.  His list is of a different kind. Like down to footwear. He likes blondes. Blondes with bobbed hair cuts to be weirdly specific (and outdated). Blondes with bobbed hair cuts that wear sundresses. And Birkenstocks. And smoke weed (not the kind you find in my yard). For the record, and just to state the obvious, I am NONE of the above aside from being blonde.

The Spinner is all of the above. I know this from my super sleuthing. Down to the sundress. Specifically a really ugly one that she sent a photo of to Mr. OoT when he said he loved them. It was hanging on a clothesline in her backyard. Of course it was. *insert eye roll here*

I’m more edgy than hippie in my dress.  I prefer footwear that doesn’t look like I’ve been wearing them since the mid ’70s.  I hate sundresses.  You can’t wear a bra with them and they have super weird squared off necklines.  And they remind me of something a little girl would wear (sorry to all you sundress lovers out there, they’re just not for me).  My life’s ambition (besides catching a tapeworm) is to grow my hair long.  And dye it super dark brown.  Just like Mr. OoT hates.  Which I will be doing next weekend.