The Life & Times of a 54 Year Old Online Dater

Thoughts on My Experiences In Search of Love & Companionship, 10 Years Running

Sunday Funday December 9, 2016

**I just found this in my drafts folder.  Thought I had published it 2 weeks ago.  Whoopsie.  Enjoy this chronologically misplaced post**

So last Sunday was my now annual gathering of friends for brunch, cocktails, laughs and catch ups.  After I accidentally invited 007 to my brunch with 15 friends and he accepted, I panicked a little.  I had only been on 2 fairly spread out dates with him and he was planning on attending a brunch with 15 of my friends who I wanted to be able to catch up with.  Uh oh.  Not wanting to be rude (no, really) I started thinking of how to keep 007 occupied with conversation by others so I wouldn’t feel obligated to talk to him the entire time.  I knew that he would be able to hold his own with strangers as he’s so friendly and outgoing.

In addition to the 15 friends that I originally invited, I reached out to those with boyfriends/girlfriends and extended the invitation to bring them along as well.  The more people, the more opportunity for conversation, right?  I messaged Friend #1 and told her to invite her boyfriend to brunch.  I get back ‘we’re no longer seeing each other, so he won’t be able to attend’.  Whoops.  Way to stick my foot in my mouth.  I sent my condolences (congratulations?) and said I was looking forward to catching up on Sunday (as I was apparently out of the loop on things).  I then messaged Friend #2 and told him to bring along his girlfriend.  To which I received ‘thanks, but we broke up 2 weeks ago’.  Well shit, I AM out of touch (and thus the reason for the group brunch).

So we’re back to the original guest list.  I’m sure all will be fine.  Saturday rolls around and I realize that I hadn’t heard from 007 since Tuesday.  Here’s where I know me.  If I was totally into him I would have checked in to make sure that he remembered in addition to obsessing all week about why I hadn’t heard from him.  But I didn’t.  While I would have been very happy for him to join us the next day, I was going to leave it up to the fates.

Sunday rolls around and my friends show up in varying degrees of lateness.  Hugs are had by all.  Laughs were had by all.  Yummy food and cocktails were had by all.  What wasn’t had by all was the pleasure of 007’s company.  Huh.  As I know he works horrid hours and this is a busy time of year for him (as it is for most of us), I figured either something came up or he overslept.  I assumed I’d hear from him later in the day with an apology.  When that didn’t happen, instead of my usual ‘you stood me up today, WTF, that’s so rude’, I sent a much more evolved (no, really) message of ‘you stood me up this morning ūüė¶ hope all is okay’.  Yes, I used a sad faced emoticon.  Sue me.

He sends back a fairly prompt ‘I did and I’m very sorry.  I was looking forward to it.  I completely slept through my alarm and only woke up in time to dress and race to work’.  I sent back that I understood and that I hoped he had a great night.  Not sure if he would have messaged me with an apology if unprompted, but I guess I’ll never know.  That was 3 days ago and I haven’t heard a word from him.  As our last 2 communications were at my prompting, I am leaving it to him to reach out.  If he does, super.  If not ……

Guess this means that I don’t have to delay my departure from town for our hot date on the 16th…….

 

 

Accidental Invite December 4, 2016

Filed under: dating,internet dating,online dating,single — Grey Goose, Dirty @ 9:45 am
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007 works shitty hours at his fascinating job.¬† Like 14 hour shifts 6 days a week.¬† Oh, and they’re overnight shifts right now too.¬† Yey me.¬† So our last date was to see the disappointing¬† Cirque Du Soleil show.¬† Then I was leaving town for 10 days.¬† We only texted once while I was away.

When I got back, our weather (no, the real weather, this isn’t a metaphor for anything) had changed and gotten really cold.¬† I texted to see if he was bundled up as it was supposed to be close to freezing that night.¬† We texted for a while and he said that he’d been thinking of me.¬† That’s sweet and all, but how am I to know if he doesn’t reach out?

He then asks me out on a date.  For December 16th.  Uh, that was 3 weeks away.  He said that all days off for his detail had been revoked due to travel plans.  I totally get that.  I guess a fascinating job equals a shitty schedule. I am supposed to leave town on the 15th for 3 weeks, but told him that I might be able to be persuaded to delay my departure.  He sweetly said that he would do his best to make that happen.

He did ask me to meet him for a late breakfast on Sunday (4 days away).¬† As I had plans already with a big group of friends I had to decline.¬† I did throw in a ‘you’re welcome to join us if you want’.¬† Being as I am meeting a group of 15 friends, I assumed that he would decline the invitation.¬† He did not.¬† He said great and that he was looking forward to it.¬† Okee dokee.

Today is Sunday Funday with friends.¬† As the last conversation I had with 007 took place via text on Tuesday and I haven’t heard from him since, who knows if he’ll actually show.¬† I guess I’ll know in about an hour ……..