43 & Single – Heaven Help Me, I've Resorted To Internet Dating!

Ridiculous & Random Stories & Thoughts on My Experiences

I Think I Had A Good Time February 27, 2017

You’re welcome in advance for this not being a whiny post about my less than envious love life.  Can I really even call it a love life if I haven’t had any semblance of a relationship in uh, years?!  *cue sad music*

Anywho, this is a post about my fun weekend at the beach with a college friend.  Well, a post about what I can remember from my fun weekend at the beach with a college friend.  My friend and I are kind of in the same boat as far as guys go.  She’s at least had a couple short lived relationships in the past few years, but the guys always either ghost, flip out or turn into someone other than who they appeared to be.  She tries to slog through the wold of online dating as well.  We are both convinced that our bad luck in love at our advanced ages is Karma firmly kicking us in the ass for all the fun we had in our 20s.  Believe me, we had a LOT of fun back then.

Back to the beach.  We arrived on Thursday afternoon and immediately decided to start day drinking.  Bad decision #1.  Bad decision #2 was to make an exceptionally strong (and large) vodka soda.  Bad decision #3 was to decide, when I discovered that I forgot to bring lemons, to add an entire can of Mike’s Harder Lemonade to my already lighter-fluid-ish drink in order to get that lemon flavor.  Bad decision #4 was to then decide, after sucking that gross tasting concoction down (can’t waste perfectly good alcohol) that since it was technically National Margarita Day (that’s a thing, right?) to go to the restaurant on property to enjoy some 2 for 1 Margaritas.  Details after that are a little fuzzy.  As in I don’t really remember shit.  My friend did assure me that I didn’t make a complete ass of myself and that I was safely passed out on the couch without having embarrassed myself too much.  Passed out on the couch by 8:30pm.  Lovely.

The next couple of days included many many cocktails, a lobster-esque sunburn,  getting lost multiple times in a town that I should really be able to navigate by now and not a single solitary conversation with anyone of the opposite sex.  Well, that’s unless you include the short and sweet conversation we had with the ridiculously drunk and obnoxious husband of the wife teetering around on stiletto heals.  At the beach.  Oh, and by ‘short and sweet’ I of course mean ‘he was a ginormous idiot that I had to stop my friend from knocking out as he had absolutely NO filter when it came to what he thought was appropriate to say to complete strangers’.

Good times!

 

Sunday Funday December 9, 2016

**I just found this in my drafts folder.  Thought I had published it 2 weeks ago.  Whoopsie.  Enjoy this chronologically misplaced post**

So last Sunday was my now annual gathering of friends for brunch, cocktails, laughs and catch ups.  After I accidentally invited 007 to my brunch with 15 friends and he accepted, I panicked a little.  I had only been on 2 fairly spread out dates with him and he was planning on attending a brunch with 15 of my friends who I wanted to be able to catch up with.  Uh oh.  Not wanting to be rude (no, really) I started thinking of how to keep 007 occupied with conversation by others so I wouldn’t feel obligated to talk to him the entire time.  I knew that he would be able to hold his own with strangers as he’s so friendly and outgoing.

In addition to the 15 friends that I originally invited, I reached out to those with boyfriends/girlfriends and extended the invitation to bring them along as well.  The more people, the more opportunity for conversation, right?  I messaged Friend #1 and told her to invite her boyfriend to brunch.  I get back ‘we’re no longer seeing each other, so he won’t be able to attend’.  Whoops.  Way to stick my foot in my mouth.  I sent my condolences (congratulations?) and said I was looking forward to catching up on Sunday (as I was apparently out of the loop on things).  I then messaged Friend #2 and told him to bring along his girlfriend.  To which I received ‘thanks, but we broke up 2 weeks ago’.  Well shit, I AM out of touch (and thus the reason for the group brunch).

So we’re back to the original guest list.  I’m sure all will be fine.  Saturday rolls around and I realize that I hadn’t heard from 007 since Tuesday.  Here’s where I know me.  If I was totally into him I would have checked in to make sure that he remembered in addition to obsessing all week about why I hadn’t heard from him.  But I didn’t.  While I would have been very happy for him to join us the next day, I was going to leave it up to the fates.

Sunday rolls around and my friends show up in varying degrees of lateness.  Hugs are had by all.  Laughs were had by all.  Yummy food and cocktails were had by all.  What wasn’t had by all was the pleasure of 007’s company.  Huh.  As I know he works horrid hours and this is a busy time of year for him (as it is for most of us), I figured either something came up or he overslept.  I assumed I’d hear from him later in the day with an apology.  When that didn’t happen, instead of my usual ‘you stood me up today, WTF, that’s so rude’, I sent a much more evolved (no, really) message of ‘you stood me up this morning 😦 hope all is okay’.  Yes, I used a sad faced emoticon.  Sue me.

He sends back a fairly prompt ‘I did and I’m very sorry.  I was looking forward to it.  I completely slept through my alarm and only woke up in time to dress and race to work’.  I sent back that I understood and that I hoped he had a great night.  Not sure if he would have messaged me with an apology if unprompted, but I guess I’ll never know.  That was 3 days ago and I haven’t heard a word from him.  As our last 2 communications were at my prompting, I am leaving it to him to reach out.  If he does, super.  If not ……

Guess this means that I don’t have to delay my departure from town for our hot date on the 16th…….